This week I attended the funeral for a friend. She was taken at 58, which is way too soon in my opinion. She was the guidance counselor at my daughters’ elementary school and had recently retired after decades of service to others. She was particularly helpful to me when my oldest daughter was in 3rd grade and the “mean girls” began to surface. She had such a wise perspective and knowledge about adolescent development. She was able to assure me that all we were experiencing was completely normal, and although unpleasant, it would not last forever. She correctly estimated that the behavior would taper off almost completely by 10th grade as the young women began to truly find their real friends. She peaked a curiosity in myself that inspired me to learn all I could about adolescents and then share that with others who inevitably went through the same things we experienced,
As I sat in the church activities center, I looked around the capacious space which had been filled with as many folding chairs as could possibly fit, and in each chair sat a person who had somehow been affected by Kim’s life, and subsequently her loss. There were hundreds in attendance and I’m sure hundreds more who wish they could have attended. Her husband spoke eloquently about how his life had been blessed beyond measure for having had her by his side for over 40 years. He spoke of how during the last days of her life she was still smiling and encouraging the very nurses who were caring for her (some of whom had known her when they had been in elementary school). The countless stories of how she had impacted strangers began to be conveyed.
It has been years since my daughters went to elementary school and I had the pleasure of seeing Kim on a regular basis. The last time I saw Kim, we were seated by each other at the nail salon. We talked and laughed during our manicures, and she told me about recently becoming a grandmother, and how much she was enjoying that phase of life. In true Kim fashion, the conversation became focused on me and my life, and how my daughters were doing. I left smiling and feeling encouraged and happy to speak to her again after so many years. To be honest, I did not know her well, yet I felt like I did. I felt as if she thought I was special. Our short interactions impacted me enough to compel me to attend her celebration of life. My take-away message is that we all have to hope and strive to impact others the way she did. Her husband adored her, her children considered her to be their best friends, her siblings respected her and enjoyed being with her. She was treasured by her co-workers. Those of us who only knew her from our short interactions, knew her to be a woman who listened, cared, and made you feel valued. She spent her life serving others; putting others before herself.
I mentioned earlier that she was taken too soon in my humble, human opinion. But my friend and I serve and love a God who has eternity as His timeline, and He knows why it was time to call her home, even though all of us who loved her wish we could have had just a little more time. As I left her funeral, although I was saddened and had certainly shed tears, I actually felt uplifted and inspired. I have never felt that way after attending such a service. But even in death, my friend is encouraging and inspiring others. I left with renewed resolve to strive to touch and love on as many people as possible in the days I have left on this earth. I want to encourage others and make them feel valued. I want to cheer for the underdog, just as my friend would have done. At the end of my life when God calls me home, I want those who attend my funeral to feel inspired to live the best version of their lives and spread as much love as possible to the broken world around them. If we all strive for this lofty goal, our world will definitely be a better place to spend our earthly lives. My friend is now beginning her eternity in heaven, and I feel confident she can rest knowing that she fulfilled God’s calling for her life. Here’s to a life well-lived…thank you,my friend, for your example.